Life with twins.

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22 year old female living in the land of magnolias and meth.
Formerly known as Vidaduerme.
Wife, student, and mother of fraternal boy/girl twins.
Delivered via c-section on October 8th, 2012 at 36 weeks and 4 days.

I am ridiculously liberal, agnostic, and I cite my sources. If you are easily offended, this is probably not the place for you.

Oh, and my name is KT.

Ask me anything  
Reblogged from kickbackandbreathe

70 hours and I still can’t sleep.

Man, I really haven’t updated in awhile. I doubt anyone reads this anymore, but here are a few updates for no reason.

We moved across Tennessee in January. We now live in a two bedroom trailer with my mother in law and her two younger sons. That’s five adults and two toddlers in a very small space. We are pursuing a larger home, but nothing has popped up in our price range.

I started a job at a delinquent girls home. I’m a glorified babysitter for girls aged 13-18 who are court ordered to be in our facility. It’s one step down from juvenile, most of our girls are in for assault/drugs/running away. I am supposed to pull four to midnight shifts 5-6 days a week, but lately I’ve been working almost every day and pulling a significant amount of doubles. This week I’ve put in 70 hours including back to back 16 hour shifts. We’re so ridiculously short handed.

Part of the job requires accompanying the girls anywhere they need to go, including doctor’s appointments, court hearings, family visitations, scheduled outings, and ER visits. I have logged a ridiculous amount of hours sitting in the ER trying to explain the medical history of a girl I’ve only known for a few weeks and signing as a legal custodian for kids I barely know. I also spend a ridiculous amount of time logging medications, arranging DCS meetings, and monitoring outside communication. I wind up having to call the police every other week or so for a runaway or an out of control fight and I’ve dealt with the fire department and EMS three or four times in the past few months. All this for 8.50 a freaking hour.

For most of their waking hours I have the responsibility of caring for eight girls who wind up in our facility not knowing where they are or who I am. They get prescribed medications they’ve never heard of to treat mental disorders they didn’t know they had. They might be up to four hours from home with no ability to have visitation with their families and the minimum stay is 90 days. We’ve had some girls in here for 8+ months with no concrete plan as to where they are going or when they might get out. Obviously, this leads to a ridiculous amount of anger and frustration on their part and I’m the only authority figure they have to let it out on for most of the day.

All that to say this, I’m fucking stressed out. My twins are growing like weeds. They make leaps and bounds on a daily basis, and I’m missing it while parenting teenagers who could care less if I am there or not. As much as I want to walk away, I can’t. I connect with maybe one girl every week, but those connections mean a lot. When you’ve had a victim cry her heart out on your shoulder because she has no family deemed suitable to raise her and all she can think to do with her life is to run away with her shitty boyfriend, it’s hard to walk away. It’s also hard to live with the uncertainty attached to finding another job. How can I go back to minimum wage at a job promising maybe 25 hours when I can barely make ends meet even with all this overtime?

Bleh. Life, man. It sucks balls sometimes. I just wish I could be with my kids more.

I also wish I could sleep.

/end incoherent rambling. 

Reblogged from blessedmommynwifee

For those who have passing interest.

I finally caught a bit of a break. I start as a Youth Care worker at a girls home next week. It’s a place for delinquent teenage girls to live and receive therapy to help them gain coping skills for the outside world. I don’t know if I’ll make any sort of difference or not, but I’ll try. 

It’s the first position I’ve ever had that paid more than minimum wage. A whopping 8.50 an hour. For that, I’m moving two and a half hours away from my parents with my twins and husband into the single wide trailer my mother in law owns. We will be sharing it with her and her three teenage sons. 

This is what I will do for 8.50 an hour. This is what is required of me to make sure my kids eat and have diapers. My previous job as a Dollar General cashier cut me from 33 hours to 13, with no warning. Post holiday retail cuts are a bitch, and no one gives a shit if you have kids or not. 

I don’t make any damn sense, I can’t write anymore. Doesn’t matter, won’t have internet after today.

Wish me luck, tumblr. It’s a long road.

So what happened to Brin?

I’m frequently without a computer, but I still try to keep up with all of you. Imagine my surprise when I pop in and Brin has disappeared! What happened? 

Reblogged from honestslogans

My kids turned one on the 8th. Because I am a bad mother, there was no big party, theme, or photo ops. Just the kids at my grandma’s house for an hour or two, smashin’ some cake. 

Some days I wonder what happened to the dose of creativity I was supposed to get at birth. Then I realize I burned it out in minimum wage-slave hell years ago.

I hate my job. Can you tell?

My kids are adorable, though. God save me from the toddler rebellion. They can now magically climb any barrier I put up and open the lids to things.

Never sleeping again.

Reblogged from nolongerlifewithmarshall-deacti

So me and Joe are looking for other places to live. And by places I mean cities.



So where do you guys live? 

What’s minimum wage?

What’s cost of living like?

What’s the average for a 1 bedroom apartment, if you know?

And lastly, what’s the area like?

avoid the south. whatever you do…. just avoid the south.

Tennessee, 7.25, cheap as hell. 350ish, tiny and very country. Avoid.

(via theycallmebitchtits-deactivated)

How do you get a damn desk job?

I’m serious. I’m qualified for one, I can damn near make a computer do backflips. I know phone systems inside and out. I have customer service skills for miles. How do I land the job? 

My resume is primarily service industry. Grocery stores, restaurants, etc. I’ve got a sprinkle of secretarial stuff but it’s all work-for-credit school jobs. No one seems to take those seriously.

Do I just walk into doctors offices and real estate places and beg? Do I volunteer at church offices and keep my shitty cashiering position? Do I pray for a 36 hour day so I can fit that all in?

I’m at a loss. Shitty part time jobs are killing me, I don’t want to be the minimum wage cashier getting shit on everytime someone needs a few more hours or wants to go on vacation. I’m sick of not having any benefits and getting screamed at over a malfunctioning credit card machine. I’m sick of smelling like food permanently. Advice? Any and all please. 

Reblogged from suspiciousrat
How I host dinner parties.

How I host dinner parties.